For the past several weeks, I have heard a running theme in class and in life in general, “Do you know who you are”? I’m not talking about the labels that you have, mother, father, sister, brother, aunt, uncle, grandmother, student, employee, etc. Do you know who you are? I’m not talking political parties or anything else. I’m talking about the cold hard facts or who you are as a person. Peel back the layers and dig deep, what are the things that you like? What are the things that you used to do but stopped doing because life took over? If you could do or be anything, taking money out of the equation, what would you do or be? Never thought about it right? Let me tell you about me.
I am young. I am a music lover, all music. I write poetry. I love movies, especially movies made in the 90s when I came of age. I like the cool fall air on my face. I like the feel of dough between my fingers. I like to be in constant motion. (That is a strict difference from constantly moving, think about it.) I am more of a lover than I am a fighter, but will fight if I have to. I love to read. I love romance novels with happy endings, but I love mystery novels with complex twist that I would never see coming. I know who I am as a person and it has taken me a while to get back to the person that I am. I know that who I am in life to others is just an extension of the person that I am naturally under all of my layers. Do you know who you are under your layers? Can you peel those layers back and know without a shadow of a doubt that this is who I am?
I think that when be become partners, wives, husbands, mothers, fathers, we lose the person that we are in the muck. We become people that we do not recognize later in life. We hear a song that reminds us of something great from a life that seems so far gone. We see a clip from a play that we saw when we were younger. We smell smells that remind us of a time when you enjoyed something that smelled the same. Do you know who you truly are now that life has changed you and warped your impressions and jaded you towards existence? I know that that sounds like a harsh sentence, but you will understand what I mean in a moment. When we become adults, we make changes in our lives that we never expect to make. We do things that make us happy but they do not make us a whole happy. Anyone that you meet can say that that statement is not true, but think about it. When you sit in a Green Day concert in your early 20s because they are your band of choice and then as an adult because your spouse is not a fan, you stop listening, do you think that that is true to who you are as a person? Some would say that we make sacrifices, but the reality is that sometimes, that becomes resentment.
So this week, ask yourself who am I? What do I like? What was that thing that I used to do that I don’t do anymore because my kids take all of my time? Figure it out and find ten, fifteen, twenty, thirty, or sixty minutes a day to do whatever it is. Whatever makes you happy, do it. I know that I am doing this now and I feel good about it.