This summer has been a rather interesting summer. I began dating a gentleman months ago. Nice guy, very respectful, and sincere. I was apprehensive introducing him to my children, but as things began to get more serious, I began to see that there was no escaping it since we spent most of our waking time together when he wasn’t at work. I introduced them to him and they, all four of them, fell in love with one another. Still my apprehension grew. I began to wonder where this would take me. Would I disappoint my children if this relationship didn’t last? He knows the dynamic of my household, yet, he stays. He hugs them and shows them affection and talks with them and is relatively concerned about them when things are going awry, my son especially. His father has not been very active with him this summer and he has assumed the role to let him know that there are other ways to be a man.
Now he’s human, he is a human being and is fearful of the same things that I am fearful of. He was shocked that my daughter, Child C, asked him to attend her birthday dinner. I was not shocked because she talks about him all the time and the wonderful encouraging things that he has to say to her. Today was one of those days after early morning text message banter that I began to fear again whether this is the right thing to do at this point in time and then my son, Child A, (I would denote them by their first initial, but all of their names start with T) told me that I did good with him. He liked him and he hoped that he stuck around.
My fears are still there. I’m still dealing with my insecurity in the situation because my marriage was not exactly what I imagined and I am fearful of not only disappointing my children, but disappointing him in the process. But child C, the 13-year-old told me today, life is a journey. You should never travel alone. Insightful for such a young age. I write this post to tell other moms like myself that there is someone who will accept your life. No matter what disability you deal with, God knows your heart and he will send someone your way that can handle your life. The key to it though is that you have to be patient.